The lunacy of Charlie Sheen has resulted in CBS shutting down production on Two and a Half Men this season.

But don’t think this news fazes the hilariously troubled actor, who texted from the Bahamas last night – where he’s vacationing with a pair of Sheen-proclaimed “goddesses,” Bree Olson and Natalie Kenly – and told Radar Online he’s nearing a deal with HBO.

“I’m close to securing a deal… for a 10 show guarantee,” he wrote. “It will be epic, all types of guests and we will focus on the truth and the absurd!”

Who could have guessed how prescient the folks behind Major League were when

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