‘Subtle Butt’ Insert Puts a Silencer on the Fart Gun
[HMG] – In what may be the only blogosphere story that does not involve Lindsay Lohan, we bring you news of the single weirdest invention since the 80’s Pet Rock: Subtle Butt.
From the same malnourished minds that brought you underarm sponges and camel-toe cups comes their newest indulgence in head-shaking hilarity, Subtle Butt – Charcoal-lined stickers that minimize bottom-burps.
Yes folks, we’re talking catalytic converters for people!
“I use them on airplanes, after a chili meal, and even on my dog,” Kim Olenicoff, the ‘brains’ behind the idea told Gawker. “Some customers have even told me these saved their marriage!”
The small fabric patches stick to your undies, and as gas passes through the activated carbon that’s hidden inside any odor is [allegedly] absorbed before it achieves nasal range.
“It’s kind of embarrassing, but it’s better to have it in and not be embarrassed,” gushes Kim, who founded her fart-thwarting empire in Orange County just ten years ago while studying law.
“I wore lots of white T-shirts at the time,” she recalls, “And I got frustrated when the underarms would yellow after just a few wearings.”
So she came up with ‘Garment Guard’ – Small sticky sponges for under the arms. And a fortune was born.
This latest addition to Kim’s bizarre brand of genius has taken her disciples by storm. Rachel Ray praised Subtle Butt on her national TV show, and Kim vigorously promotes them herself via Twitter.
The only thing dumber would be a chocolate tea-pot, but the idea that she won’t make $1-million from these would be the actual surprise.
So let’s take a vote – would you wear them?…
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‘Subtle Butt’ Insert Puts a Silencer on the Fart Gun